ExpertLaw's Collection of Lawyer Jokes

What's The Difference ...

What's the difference between a lawyer and a boxing referee?

A boxing referee doesn't get paid extra for a longer fight.


What's the difference between a lawyer and a leech?

When you die, a leech will stop sucking your blood and drop off.


What's the difference between a lawyer and an angry rhinoceros?

The lawyer charges more.


What's the difference between a lawyer and a trampoline?

You take off your shoes to jump on a trampoline!


What's the difference between a lawyer and a computer nerd?

Sooner or later everyone needs a lawyer.


What's the difference between a lawyer and a catfish?

One is a scum-sucking bottom feeder, and the other is a catfish.


What's the difference between a dead skunk in the road and a dead lawyer in the road?

There are skid marks in front of the skunk.


What's the difference between a hooker and a lawyer?

A hooker will stop screwing you after you are dead.


What's the difference between a lawyer and a gigolo?

A gigolo only screws one person at a time.


What's the difference between a lawyer and a vampire?

A vampire only sucks blood at night.

These joke pages are intended to inspire smiles, smirks and groans. We have attempted to create a collection of quality lawyer jokes and cartoons, and hope that you find many you haven't seen before. If you hate lawyer jokes, don't read 'em - and lighten up! For the rest of you, we hope you get a good laugh.

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